You probably know such agreements between friends: when a boy and a girl joke that if they are 40 years old, they will still be alone, then they marry each other. Have there been any such cases?
Just such a question was asked by one Reddit user and the story he received in response touched thousands of people.
«We met in college and immediately became best friends.I was 20, she was 18. We spent all the time together, were lovers for a while, but never met officially, because both wanted to be free, independent and enjoy youth. From time to time we met with other people, discussed it. We understood that our relationship - it must be either all or nothing. But we did not want to give up such a loose and irresponsible way of life, because we decided not to even try. So a few years passed, and we were happy until her sisters died.
It was an accident. They were 16 and 18, and both died in the accident. My girlfriend was completely broken.It still hurts me to remember this even now. Her father killed even more; he almost died of starvation because he did not want to eat anything. She moved home to look after him. For a while she stopped communicating with everyone, even with me. I have not seen her for about two years.
After she became completely different. She used to be very fun and positive. And after it became quieter, sadder, perhaps wiser. I wanted to be with her more than ever. I could not fix anything for her, could not do something better, and from that it was even more painful. Perhaps it was then that I realized how much I love her.
I admitted to her that I wanted to be with her, but she said that she could not even think about some kind of emotional connection with anyone. Maybe a few more years, maybe never. She did not know if she would ever be able to open again to someone. She said that she needed space even from me. She said that she needed time to figure out how to be alive in a world where her sisters no longer exist.She asked for time, and I said that I would give her everything she needed.She said she was never happier than when we were together. I told her the same thing. I said that I understood her, and that was when we agreed.I was 25, she was 23. We decided that if she turned 30, and I was 32, and if she was already moving away from the tragedy, and I won’t fall in love with anyone, then we will get married. And our paths diverged. She moved to Wyoming to be alone. I moved to Germany, as far as possible from her.
At first we did not keep in touch, but for several years we made contact. We wrote letters because both love it. We wrote on e-mail. We were getting closer and closer.
When I turned 30, I half joked about our agreement.I said that I didn’t fall in love with anyone (I didn’t tell her, but I just compared each woman with her, and in my memory she was perfect). She replied that she seriously remembers our contract, and that she did not fall in love with anyone either. I asked if she had moved away from the family tragedy, and she said that yes, as far as it is possible to move away from something like that. A year later, she offered to meet and spend time together, to see if there was a spark between us.
She stayed. She lived in California at the time, and I found work there. Anyway, I always wanted to live in California.
After 6 months, I made her an offer, she smiled and said: “It's not fair” that I need to wait a few more months until she turns 30.I thought it was stupid, but then everything was so good for us that for a few months it meant nothing. I'm already crying, because it's time to finish ...
She died. This is how our story ends. She was hit by a drunk driver, and she spent 2 days in the hospital before being given out her body. I went to the funeral. I talked to her father, but I barely remember what. Since then, we no longer communicate. I do not have enough willpower to find out how he is doing.
In November there will be 4 years, as it happened. I am going through therapy and learning how to feel something again, not just one emptiness, pitiful rage.I always think she probably felt that way. But she was able to survive.She learned to feel again. And this thought helps me to go further. She could. She would like me to be able to.
That's all. This is our story. A crap story, I hate it. ”